antisocialism has reached a peak.
fair enough that i next-to-never attempt to initiate conversations online except when necessary;
now, i even feel aversion to the programme virtually the whole world thrives on, known as msn.
must try to be more sociable;
the need greatly fuelled by the future company's networking night not too long ago, where i was timely saved several times before conversation with some "key people" could reach an uncomfortable silence.
but yeah, i admit i'm not the easiest person on earth to talk to.
arghh,
i hereby declare socialising more mentally taxing than crunching audit theory.
heh. but to get over stuff like these require the right mindset;
and i just shot myself in the foot by that last statement :X
perserverence, bell.
and i don't know how i did it,
but was blur enough to leave my pencilcase and calculator behind in the exam hall after the audit paper, but brought all other stuff out.
sjl must have thought i was in such a hurry to leave the hall when she sent that mail notifying me haha.
well done, yeah..
check this out:
"XXX" festival in japan sometime last week.
LOLLOLLOL
finally time for a breather.
after three weeks of almost constant headaches and hermit lifestyle;
longest stretch i spent at home was four days
most of which spent directing what little concentration i have to audit.
and..
felt damn sad that i'll have to devote at least the next two years of my life to SSAs and countless assessments and procedures boooo...
need to be more vigilant towards my stuff at home as well.
in light of the virginia tech incident, and subsequent revelations about the twisted mind of the killer;
the parents have commented unfavourably about the media content youngsters nowadays take interest in-
and it would do neither me nor them good for "funny" stuffs to be discovered hidden away amongst my belongings.
i'm talking about people who think deathnote is unedifying. gosh.but that incident did strike some chord.
shall start preparations for the last paper ever tomorrow.
don't even know anything that has been going on;
what was i doing the entire semester?
colour my heart black,
for the lack of colour will depict lack of the ability to feel
and for you,
V6 - I Don't Forgive
right now,
tokio's boku no renai makes me wanna race down the coast on a motorbike without a helmet.
endlicheri's someiyoshino makes me wanna walk beneath the sakura trees in yoyogi park.
ayumi's no way to say makes me wanna sit quietly and finish my lorenzo carcaterra novel left untouched for two weeks, stopped at a climax.
younha's houkiboshi makes me wanna watch bleach, other anime and my six weeks' backlog of japanese variety.
lead's drive alive makes me wanna spend an entire day in town watching the world go by.
mr children's tomorrow never knows makes me wanna just live for the day without worrying what will happen tomorrow.
how come there isn't one that motivates me to do what i should really be doing now?
:: sampling is so random; add to the fact there's something called haphazard sampling makes it even more random bleah.. ::
v6's i don't forgive is now making me not forgive myself for semi blackout-ing for yesterday's paper :(
somehow, setting a lower expectation for yourself makes you contented;
but is there a price to pay?
tendayswillpassbyquickly. oh yes.
as ichigo constantly gets asked by zangetsu in bleach,
"覚悟ができたか?"
my answer is yes.
two core papers in twenty four hours.
and i've found enough motivation to last me the next two weeks;
before it's all over.
yes, i got what i asked for. what more could i want?
go me.
i'm always excessively depressed during the studying/exam period;
progressively for the past three years, save for the semester in manchester.
for a myraid of reasons that undoubtedly varies from semester to semester.
...maybe depressed is too strong a word;
a culmination of negative perceptions may perhaps provide a more apt description.
that leads to..
engagement in my three vices-
which unfortunately, are even more detrimental than degenerating mental spirit.
even more so when they are engaged in all together,
which i am very prone to doing.
so this is what they call a vicious cycle.
being the spoilt, stubborn and ill-disciplined person,
there's no known way i'd choose to break out of this cycle yet;
(ironically, this may be the reason why the downward spiral doesn't stop)
so i'm not complaining.
but,
would you rather i lie, or not say anything because i don't wanna lie?
then again, you wouldn't know whether i was lying or not in the first place, aye?
this...
... was brilliant.
full house last night at my first ever show at the esplanade.
and really.. the phantom's voice blew me away from the first word; "insolent..."
the set was excellent as well-
changing of scenes and the phantom's lair; which was defintely my favourite scene.
the part where he first brought christine in and "rowed" a boat through the dry ice while giving an excellent rendition of the theme song was the highlight of the show for me; second to the minor-key dominant soundtrack which is really the whole point of the show.
the new cast no doubt did full justice to sir andrew lloyd webber's work~
almost a hundred buckeroos well spent =)
then say you'll share with me one love, one lifetime;
let me lead you from your solitude..
say you need me with you, here beside you,
anywhere you go, let me go too;
that's all I ask of you..
haven't been extraordinarily busy or what not to justify the lack (or not) of updates.
simply, i don't know what to blog about.
my dad's recent fascination about 7-11 doraemon magnets?
my mom's sudden love for shounen anime?
my sis' frustration at the fujitsu service team?
or me spending three hours this morning reading entire weekend's newpapers?
bleah.
sadly, i don't lead a life as interesting as some figures who can update their blog daily without facts that bore the public.
but i agree that updating thirty times daily is abit too much.
and i can never be as optimistic as one of those said figures, whose entries can really brighten anyone's day up; nor write in a coherent way given the fragmented way my brain operates.
did i just type a whole load of rubbish?
i'm really sorry.
time to start preparing for tomorrow's presentation-
suddenly realized that i'm presenting the part which forms the core of the project.
and pray i don't fall over tomorrow wearing heels on my recovering twisted ankle =\
fen: i've managed to get the entire popupsmap album online. msg me when you want it ok?