that's what happens when something you've been muddling about for ages hits home with austere clarity.
something akin to... liberation.
at least that's what it felt like for me :)
decided once and for all.. and i'm gonna stick by it.
like i always do.
because, things don't always turn out the way it was envisioned, and people evolve with time.
goodbye, my humble ambition.
you'll still be hanging around, but in lesser intensity and more obscure situations :)
told all this to a select few,
and most of them were supportive but i wonder why.
like all failures (for the lack of a better word), shouldn't encouragement be given instead of comforting phrases and those along the line of "i told you so?"
was doubting the initial decision, but gradually when it materialized, it feel bloody good to decide once and for all.
should have been THAT adamant in the first place,
but then again, would i have made the decision without going through the present phase?
for those who still bother,
i've given up on japanese language on the official slate. gonna be around just enough for me to understand colloquial conversations in varieties/dramas and comprehend 70% of novels.
business japanese? after REALLY struggling with classes and self-improvement... nah.
never thought decision making could make such an impact :O
i knew it would boil down to choosing something over the other one day.
and i never doubted which one i'd choose.
but what shocked me was the ease with which i made the decision.
do i really want to pursue this to the end?